RHS Art: Poetry by Jenna Barney

“Falling Behind”
By Jenna Barney

If you are Helios, then I am Mercury
You are my light, I revolve around you
You burn my skin with your fiery kisses
Kisses that you refuse to give
Your love is like gravity, and I'm feeling heavy
No matter how much you wound me
I stay by your side in unwavering loyalty
As if love can heal the pain you've inflicted
You're a blazing fire
And I'm melting under your gaze
I live a life of eternal sunburn
Forever scorched and tortured by affection
Your touch is a disease, a perilous poison
You leave me to die, alone in the dust
But somehow I always find a cure
It's just barely enough to keep me alive
I hiss through my wounds and my endless bleeding
I feel like I'm dying, but your love keeps me alive
I pick myself up and stitch my heart back together
And I convince myself that I'm okay
Finally you stop with your sick, twisted games
And the cold, hard truth weighs me down like lead
I lose my footing, and I'm falling hard
And when I hit the ground, I'm permanently broken
This time, my resources are limited
And I'm no longer able to fix my broken bones
I continue walking, but my scars distract me
They laugh in my face, following and haunting me
Maybe one day I'll be able to pick myself up
But for now, I am damaged, and I speak to no one
I'm alone in this world, with only a rose to accompany me
And as night falls, it stares me in the face
And I wonder if I can bring myself to love again.

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